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Tomorrow the Dustball Rally launches from Dallas en route to Miami. Your typical southwestern styles aren’t going to cut it down in that southern Florida Pastel Paradise. Not to worry, we have a packing list for you right here:

Miami is full of Pretty faces in pretty places. Earth tones are a no go and don’t even think about wearing reds. If your attire looks like either. Time to go shopping.

While we’re on the topic, don’t neglect a nice pair of shoes but do forget the needless nuisance of socks. If you’re gonna spend $400 on a pair of shoes, a $12 pair of socks kind of ruins it. Miami clothing is for comfort and color. Don’t over think it.

If you are prone to being flashy, then we don’t have a cool and calculated Tubbs solution for you. You can take your New York formal tie and shirt and figure that on your own. We’re here to perfect that beach bum charm and our Crocket-esque three day stubble.

A proper Miami rally team should be wearing the least wrinkled, cleanest thing each morning. White jacket optional, no belts, and of course, no socks.

All of this is aided by a hotel room on a boat. And/or a pet crocodile named Elvis.

See you on the starting grid.